Have you ever found yourself in a situation like this?
- Your baby has cried non-stop for hours.
- You've done everything you can think of, but the baby is still crying.
- You're frustrated and exhausted.
- Nothing works.
Which way do you react?
Do you lose control, grab the baby, and scream, "What do you want?" or "Shut up!" or "I can't take this any more!" And then...you shake your baby in frustration.
Or do you back off, get help, and calm down before picking up your baby?
Each year, about 1,000 children die because of shaken baby syndrome.
When an infant is shaken, the baby's head snaps back and forth. The vessels in your child's head cannot tolerate the impact of the extensive shaking. The vessels break, causing blood to empty into the baby's skull.
You didn't know it was so easy to cause your child's brain to bleed, did you? We know you don't want to harm your baby. You may simply be tired and angry for a moment. But if you lose control, even for an instant, it can haunt you for a lifetime. You and your child may deal with possible neurological damage, mental retardation, seizure disorder, or blindness as a result.
Here's what you can do.
When your baby is irritable, make sure all his/her needs are met. Rock the baby in the crib or your arms, put him in his stroller and take a walk, or put him in his car seat and take a ride.
If you feel your patience is evaporating and you're exhausted and can't take it anymore, put your baby in his/her crib and leave the room for a while until you are calm again. Ask your partner to care for the baby or ask for help. Call a friend or a relative. Take a walk after getting some help before you take over again.
Don't shake your baby. A moment of anger may haunt you for a lifetime.
You have been given a precious gift--a child.
Parenting your child will not always be easy. Along with the laughter, the hugs, and the fun there will be fatigue, frustration, and impatience. Sometimes the worries and problems that prompt raising your hand against your child have nothing to do with the child.
Raising your hand in anger never solves the problem and often creates new problems.
Child Protection Program
First Published: 2003
Last Revised: October 2003
Peer Review Status: Internally Peer Reviewed
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